I read this on the following site: sshDontTell She wrote it so if you repost- give her the credit. Very interesting view on love... <3

Women are more emotionally healthy compared to men. From day one women are trained that, good or bad, you express your feelings and let them out. That bottling them up is unhealthy and can drive you crazy, which is probably the least of the side affects. Mean while, men are taught, good or bad, to lock up their emotions. That expressing them would lead society to categorizing you [a heterosexual male] as a “sissy” “weak” or “homo,” all of which carry a negative connotation [not that being gay is a negative thing, but in conservative main stream society it is, unfortunately]

And that really sucks, because that is where our wires get crossed.

Men claim not to understand women. And women claim not to understand men. But hello… we’re basically being raised not to understand one another.

A man and a woman in a relationship love each other, but lack communication. The woman wants to express her feelings and wants her man to express his to her. They argue. The man feels uncomfortable and can’t escape the box society has placed his emotions in and gets frustrated with the woman. He lashes out verbally or maybe worse physically. Depending on the type of woman she is, she either lashes back out at him in defense in what ever similar manner, or she cowers in a sea of her emotions.

[shrugs]

Now what?

Nothing. That’s what.

Until both realize the problem and are consciously willing to break the cycle, it will only continue. And animosity and frustration will only mount further. It will tear them apart. And their love… a memory.

It isn’t a manner of “meant to be” “destiny” whatever… it’s finding that person who can understand you. Who can work with you. Who you can work with. Who sees you as the imperfect person you are and appreciates the good and the bad. Who can see the slob who digs in his nose when no one is looking [or even when they are looking], but at the same time is the only person who can make you belly laugh so hard, you swear you can cross off your 200 ab crunches for the week. Or the neurotic worry wart that has you call her at every new destination you make along the day, but at the same time sees you as her magnificent Adonis; as Adonis’s with beer belly guts go.

That’s the same person, who when something goes wrong in your relationship, sees the worth in the relationship, and sees the worth in you enough to say… “You know what, this cycle sucks. And I want this to work. I’ll listen to you. And you listen to me. No yelling.” All the while keeping in mind that their unity [you + me = us] is what’s most important. Not whose right or who’s wrong. Not getting even, holding grudges, or spite.

Believing that “love conquers all” is all and good. But realistically, love is not a luxury or leisure. Love is hard work. And it takes mending, making mistakes, learning, growing, nurturing, understanding. Maybe believing that “only the strong survive” in regards to love is a better way to look at it.

The Romantics wrote of a perfect love. An easy love that’s only obstacle was an outside dividing force. Reality- there is no one “cookie cutter” perfect love. Your perfect is not my perfect. And the greatest obstacles don’t have to be in any outside dividing force, it can be right here, within us. Two people in a relationship. One pitted against the other. Because they don’t get each other. But they love each other.

They hurt each other. But they love each other.